Mittwoch, 18. Juli 2007

Real Hip Hop?

CLICK PLAY.

Isn't this by far realer than everything released in the last 5 months?
Taking it waaaaaaaaay back...and hey...this is not LL, not Run, not even
close...Click it or fool yourself.

hip hop ?

Donnerstag, 12. Juli 2007

Ambition

Question Marks..

Sometimes i wonder whether it's my ambition that limits me the most. Whilekids or let's call them young adults my age settle for jobs, it's not a job that i want, but a successful and flourishing career. I don't know why it's so hard these days watching all of these overrated folks make it in the industries*, whirring around the cities obtruding their hustle* onto each potential customer, who happens to inject $-signs in their eyes while the muzak plays the tunes of a money-hungry cash desk waiting to give little exchange for big expenditures.

I want to have a career because i refuse to settle for less. Less then I can achieve, less than I can do, because I have too many raw talents and I know and am able to do so much more than life offers me. Now, ain't that a bitch, that ..this whole "gameplan" of "making it if you try" is conditioned by thesupport your 1. parents give you , be it of emotional or financial nature, 2. the support your environment gives you seeing you're trying, 3. the confidence you have about being THE SHYT, while nobody believes in you. I believe the first one, parental faith and support in all matters is what is most necessary for a child, even a teenager, or adult.

If your closest ones don't teach you to strive to achieve, nor help you open any of the doors that smooth the way to your destinatinated talents, there is nobody and nothing that will ever be able to show you. If you're damaged by their negligence and slackness in the essential years of your conscious thinking, you will surely
get screwed in the long run...It's gonna be so much
harder.

At 23, and 10 years of missing parental love and support, nor any faith or belief that one day their child could make it, [because they failed to live properly, and accepted the given, while watching me quietly while I - rugrat - stand out in all matters..], I stand confused and limited by the lack of 1. emotional 2. financial possibilities to step into the future happily. How great and different would life be, had they provided the proper understandings, push-on nature and dedication, when it was most needed. Not saying difference = greatness. No it's not that. Not solely. People are cruel once they have given up on reaching a better life, because it seemed too hard. I hate such people. Now just think about it..considering, those
are your own parents. You are forced to develop some sort of hypocritical approach to them. You love those people, but you hate their lack of ambition, because that's that slacky shit that made them stop [or not even start] pushing for you.

Gave my all, in school, work, in life, in love and friendships.Been slapped with nothing but pain in all maters. I hope the positive receipt for all of this will be handed in due time. How unfair would it be...if trying harder than others
was nonsense, right? But hey..then again...remember they said..Life's a bitch..and then you die ....Watchout, quoting two of the biggest in this post..Guess who?!
That was random.

Show me a way to use what I have, because what i have is unlimited..
Shouldn't my possibilities be?
Now by myself, all i have are the..great shambles of the big dream..trying
to put the puzzle together as days go by. One day? - From rags to riches..I ain't dumb, I got 99 problems ....

Mittwoch, 11. Juli 2007

Best of Me


Loved you, Lost you
Thought I'd give you all the best of me, uhhh
We departed, broken hearted,
I need to be free
What we had was oh so lovely
I'll swallow my pain,
It's my time to find the best of me

Can't be the type to be begging
Can't be the type to plead,
My mama made me much wiser,
What's mine will be just for me, yeah
I'm trying hard to just focus,
I'm trying hard to sleep,
Promise I'm glad you're happy
When it's my time it will be.
Look I'm moving on.


+
I could’ve stayed in that place too long.
I would’ve made it okay for you to do me wrong.
I would’ve played the role one more day
If I didn’t hear my conscience say:
stop, look around, is this where you belong?
Look at yourself: are you weak, are you strong?
I realize that it's all up to me to make myself happy.
Finally I walked away, never would’ve seen this day,
givin’ up on those things that hurt me made me who I am today.
(Brandy - Finally; Afrodisiac[2004])


Samstag, 7. Juli 2007

All alone








God be sending me signs like my future is preordained
my timing keep gettin fucked, the wires still havent came
and all I do is object but my shit ain't never sustained
wonder if I keep on trying then will I finally attain
wonder if I'll ever feel like I got nobody to blame..Mayne!


Feels like..the world just keeps crushing down on me.